Saturday, March 20, 2010

Literary Update

It's that time again; time to examine my literature choices and wrinkle your nose in incredulity. Yes, I'm that nerdy. Like my movies, I prefer literature that is a powerful commentary on society and has been largely ignored by the masses. Give me knowledge! I've been working on expanding my author-knowhow, so here's what has flashed past my eyeballs in the last couple months....

Michael Coney - The Hero of Downways (1973)

Jack Williamson - Manseed (1983)

Stephen Goldin - Mind Flight (1978)

Frederick Pohl - Slave Ship (1956)

Philip Wylie - The End of the Dream (1972)

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Gossip (2000)

It's just so hard to resist those b-list, sultry sex symbols who graced the screens last millennium as angsty adolescents. With a release date of 2000, this one was clearly on the edge. But as I've recently noticed...: the turn of the millennium may seem futuristic in my memory, but movies show me that it was actually a long time ago, and besides, I was still in high school. This is a perfect example. Brown lip liner, chunky heels and grungesque tudes are so last century. We have the murder-mystery, sex-fueled, turtleneck wearing college kids who binge drink at the clubs every night and enroll in journalism classes with techno-centric professors and a roster of 300+. And don't forget the feminist, ie. clearly delineating the boundaries of rape, supertones played out beautifully by the always bra-less Kate Hudson. Joshua Jackson (of Dawson), Lena Headey (Sarah Conner Chronicles) and James Marsden (Cyclops) also all grace the screen with their guilty, hungover portrayal of dirty life in higher education. Luckily, the blame gets cast on characters who have lots of money, so don't probably won't think they're telling a story about your kind. Oh yeah, and don't forget the Admiral my Admiral, Edward James Olmos (as in, you olmos know who he is), who plays out his pock-faced glory as a wayward Detective. Anyway, adolescent angst aside, there's one true reason I'm posting about this movie. And no, it's not the fact that it completely bombed at the box office (this is watch instantly after all...). It's because a large amount of the tension in the movie actually arose from inability to communicate with someone without actually seeing them and/or finding a payphone. That's right, 2000 or no, these dudes are running all over the place with big secrets and warnings when a simple text could have solved all their problems! Ah, life before technology. And in the rain!

But then again, a sickening T-Mobile commercial confirms your worst fears about the fate of phone-owner interaction or lack thereof....

Yes, that's a sad, sad thing.
But perhaps the backlash is finally arriving? I hate to quote a Lady Gaga song, but the new Telephone thing, regardless of the fact that she openly admits that it was written in all shallowness, might say more than she means. As Beyonce proudly proclaims, "I should have left my phone at home." There just might be hope yet...

Life as we know it.

I deem it: "An always adept reminder of life before cellphones and the murderous intentions of dastardly, drunken college kids"

Monday, March 1, 2010

Scrooged (1988) it is...the movie that inspired Facebook profile pic changes and provoked hair jokes for weeks in my homely household. This is classic, late 80's comedy with one-liners and crassness galore. To cut to the chase, we're talking 101 minutes of unharnessed, unadulterated, unabridged Bill Murray, and damn does he know he's good. This is a clear case of A Christmas Carol, but with a raunchy, big-business media co. twist that makes it sing so sweetly. Bill Murray's Costner hair is obscenely bad, and there are definitely some crazy fetus demons and a tv-head. As Murray would say "are you glad to see me or is that a shotgun in your pocket?"

The other star of this shitacular is none other than femme fatale Karen Allen of Raiders fame. I was confused at first because I thought she was Margot Kidder. I mean, seriously, they look exactly alike. But upon imdb inspection, I realized that Richard Donner just has a type. Yowza.

And don't forget performances by my two main men, Michael J. Pollard (aka The Other Tesla) and Bobcat Goldthwait who must be a hissing pussy in the sack. All in all, I would rack this up as another success, albeit it a close call, in the long and lustrous career of Bill Murray. Clearly his awesomeness was the sole reason for the existence and survival of this 80's gem, but you know what they say: party hardy marty!

Final Judgment: "Santas with machine guns?: "Yule love it!"/"The bitch hit me with a toaster!"/A sweet reminder of the simpler, more sexist days of the 1980's.